Monday, 22 July 2013

The measure of a vehicle.

On a primitive level humans have to judge other humans- are they dangerous, a threat, a sexual predator, trustworthy or in possession of suitable genes? It is important to be able identify encounters with others as safe or unsafe; a key factor for survival.

Today our situation has changed yet our need to judge remains the same. It is perfectly acceptable to be wary of strangers and to stay clear of those who are potentially a risk to oneself or one's family. Yet, in today's society our criteria for judging is not quite as clear cut.

Our desire to be publicly popular

A man pulls up in a rusty old banger, lights a cigarette and takes a swig from a can of Special Brew- chances are you judge this man for drinking and driving, a perfectly acceptable reaction as this could endanger you. A Vauxhall Corsa speeds past at 90mph with happy hard core blasting out of the sub-woofer- again you automatically judge the driver as an idiot charva and hope that a mobile speed camera is around the corner. Not a problem, you are using your judgement to access potential harm.

How about you?

Your new promotion comes complete with a spanking new company Range Rover, as you stop to fill up the tank you spot a lady you attended school with struggling to take the petrol cap off her shabby looking Ford- you immediately inflate yourself to being superior, yet instead of going to help her, catching up and learning about her life, you smile smugly and get back into your beast, conclude that you've 'done better than her', 'you've made it'.

Made what exactly? How do you know that your life is more worthy than hers? By what measure? Is there a chart I can refer to because the whole thing confuses the hell out of me. Yes, at times I get a bit jealous and my inner demon shouts out expletives; I've been brain washed into thinking that material possessions are a measure of wealth. They are not.

How do we measure success?

I've drifted somewhat...my point is that we are constantly judging others, which is natural, yet there are so many times where we are unwilling to change our point of view and accept that we are the one's with the problem. I'm no saint, I am guilty of letting my green eyed monster escape into my mouth and wreck havoc, yet I have also learned to reason why I reacted the way I did. Have I avoided going out with friends because they are more attractive than I? Have I avoided going swimming in order to not have my body compared with others? Have I stopped talking to somebody because their constant successes make me squirm?

These are my problems, my demons, my insecurities. Possessions and material wealth are not a measure of success or happiness. You've heard it a zillion times before that a man can have everything in the world yet this is nothing without love.

Overcome your demons

Love for family, friends and ultimately oneself is what allows us to be at peace. Happiness is the ability to change what we can and accept the things we can not. Today I am the richest woman in the world because I love and am loved.

In the words of The Beatles- All you need is love.
 (Please note, this is probably the only time I will ever quote The Beatles- the Liverpuddlians too big for their boots, totally past it, overrated with silly haircuts and ridiculously rich twerps ;-)

P.S- I am not a car buff and therefore apologise if I have offended anyone who owns the aforementioned cars, for the record I had a Corsa and a Ford in the past; currently I drive a rusty old banger.





Monday, 15 July 2013

The true meaning of precious

Today my Son had a small accident on the living room carpet dropping something resembling a cow pat down the sides of his shorts. In panic, I shouted angrily, demanded that he went upstairs, grabbed some cleaning products and set to scrubbing my precious carpet. Now, let me tell you a bit about the history of our living room carpet- after saving up and persuading my husband to part with his laminate flooring (which for the record took four years) I became the happy owner of a new, fluffy and all round amazeball carpet. Yippee.

That cat again..

Within a month my cat lost her sight and got cystitis which equated in two puddles of cat wee in separate patches on the new carpet, well I say puddles, by the time we discovered the source of the unpleasant scent the urine was very well absorbed. Loosing her sight also meant that the cat struggled to find her way around and so repeatedly tried to open the door by digging up said carpet (cat's are not renown for their intelligence).

Then it was my turn...after months of repeatedly remembering and forgetting (at which most mothers are highly skilled) I still had not bought a rug to sit by the fireplace (you can see where this is going can't you?). Yes, I poked the log burner, out fell a huge lump of red-hot wood which split into nineteen (I counted the stains) different pieces and rolled onto said carpet. My world fell apart, I had destroyed my carpet, it was nobody's fault but my own, I sobbed for twenty minutes, I really should have bought that rug.

Lamenting the laminate

After the cat wee, the cat clawing, the log burn-ering, my precious carpet had lost its appeal. Lamenting the loss of my spanking new carpet to a blind car and my own carelessness today I took out my frustrations on my Son. My Son who is still potty training, who had a poorly tummy, who was not at fault and whose confidence in his own abilities I single-handedly destroyed.

Writing this was not easy. The guilt I currently feel will pass no doubt more quickly than it should. My point is that material possessions, the things we think are important are not. It is just stuff, it was just a carpet, a phone, some new wallpaper, a computer, the car, some jewellery... What truly matters is our family, the children that challenge us and how we react to them. For when the ones we love make us want to pull out our hair in frustration- this is the time when they need our love the most.

Monday, 8 July 2013

Fighting to be fit

I shall let you into a secret- I used to be fat. Fat is a term I use loosely being, like most of us my own worst critic, I was carrying a couple of extra stone around for emergencies. After the birth of my second child I was left with some unnecessary weight to flush out with the disposable nappies. So began the fight to become a healthy weight and one of those annoying people who spends their time doing things like cycling, hiking and gyming it.

Three years later and I have achieved the above. Let me tell you another secret- there is no secret, there is no magic pill, there are no wonder foods or hard core work out which will guarantee a six pack in six weeks. There is hard work, determination and inspiration. Here's what worked for me-

Breastfeeding- Breast milk isn't best, it is key. Key to not only producing the healthiest baby you are able to bring up but also key to shedding excess baby weight, burning calories and pulling in your over-stretched uterus. Don't be fooled into think you need to eat more, stop eating for two and the fat will fall off.

Eating well 95% of the time- Gillian McKeith (crazy yet informative) would be proud of my kitchen supplies. You will find nothing in my home which could potentially lead to a binge. I am an all or nothing kind of girl, give me a square of chocolate and I will buy six tubs of Ben & Jerry's, without any sugar in my diet I will not miss it or desire it. Eveybody deserves a treat, and I save the unhealthy foods for eating out and holidays. Don't buy it and you can't eat it.

Exercise- I am a runner. It doesn't matter how far, how fast or how often you run just put on your trainers (and a good sports bra) and head out. There is no excuse, if you want your body to change and burn fat then you have to work it. I love running, man there are times I could throw in the towel, where every sinew in my body screams at me to stop but I have never finished a run and regretted it. Everybody starts somewhere, my first run took less than ten minutes to complete and about two days to recover from. Remember, there is always going to be somebody fitter and faster than you, don't compare yourself. There is also always somebody fatter and flabbier. This is your race, you against you.

Know your limits- Accept who you are and be realistic. I too could have a six-pack if I was able to work out for hours every day, had some surgery to remove excess fat and lost another two stone (which would make me 8st for my 5ft 10" frame by the way) but is this realistic? No. I have work to do, children and a house to look after, a life outside of vanity. I also have (dare I say the forbidden words) stretch marks which no amount of diet or exercise will EVER remove. Accept who you are, your body shape and size which feels as good as it looks.

Find Inspiration- We all need friends and family who inspire and support us. My husband keeps me fit, we work out together once a week, one of my best friends runs marathons and does athletics, regularly flashing her perfect abs (sod) and this is what keeps me going.

Life is a challenge, fitness is a huge part of this. If you manage to juggle both then one will extend the other. Stop making excuses and searching for quick fixes, you don't need to loose weight or tone up before starting a work-out programme, just get moving. Remember this is your life, your body and your race. The biggest challenge you will ever face is the battle inside your mind. Have determination, have drive, loose that weight and live that life to the full. Don't look back with regret, look forward with a desire to be a better you.

Eye of the Tiger.



Sunday, 7 July 2013

I'm back

So here I am back again after an non intentional but necessary absence. My excuse lies in the domain of University, I have now finally completed my degree in English Literature (cheerleaders feel free to jump around at this point).

So the question on everybody's lips is- What now? When I say everybody I mean everybody, everybody now expects me to go and do something, they expect me to reveal my master plan and at this point I shall let you into a little secret; I like millions of other graduates have absolutely no plan. There is no plan for the next fifty years Pinky, I shall not be taking over the world. Ok, so maybe that is a bit of an exaggeration as I do have a slight sway towards a career in writing but as to knowing what I am going to...or how to get there....or where to start is a bit of a blank.

SO I am back to blogging, I finally have the time, I have kissed goodbye to Shakespeare, James Joyce and Pat Barker and said a big 'Hello' to freedom (note that I use the term loosely as family commitments and housewife/mother responsibilities leave me with approximately sixty minutes spare a day) as throughout my free time I will be attempting to do the following:-

Plug, plug, plug me. Social networker here I am. Facebook, Twitter, Google+..I will be trying to publicise my work as much as possible so please share my posts and comment on my work.

Write, write and write some more. Aim one is to complete a novel, aim two is to get it published.

I am inspired to write and surf the net. I look forward to meeting this journey with open arms, not knowing where this will take me or whether I will ever actually need to use my English degree or whether it will lead to rags or riches but I do know that it is an adventure I am beginning right here, right now.

Watch this space.